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MWF Seeking BFF

One of the new blogs I discovered in 2010 was MWF Seeking BFF. She didn’t end up on my best of list for 2010 because she gets her own post. I think that’s fair. 😉

Rachel moved to Chicago recently from another city, finding herself friendless. Not that she didn’t have friends she’d left behind, but friends you leave behind when you go to a new city aren’t exactly the people you call up to do a TV marathon with on a lazy Sunday. You need new friends for that. So Rachel decided to get some new friends, and that’s what this blog is all about.

The great thing is that Rachel explores all aspects of friendship, from disappearing friends to work friends to having a famous friend. I don’t think there’s a rock she hasn’t looked under when it comes to friendship.

Not only that, but she’s put herself out there so she’d make friends. She’s gone speed friending, taken an improv class, and started a book group.

Here’s some of my favorite posts of hers:

In addition to making me think about nurturing the friendships I have, she’s inspired me to be on the lookout for new friendships. I’m hoping with to make some new mommy friends so I can have play dates for my baby and mommies to commiserate with. But it’s going to take some work, and putting myself out there, but reading Rachel’s stories make it seem a lot less daunting.

Rachel’s got a book coming out in 2012 called MWF Seeking BFF, which will be published by Ballantine. In the meantime, I encourage you to follow her on her journey as she finds a new BFF. Be sure to subscribe to her blog, follow her on Twitter, and friend her on Facebook. I have!

In the meantime, why don’t you tell me about your BFF? I recently reconnected with an old BFF and it’s like the years melted away. It’s too bad we were out of touch for so long, but we picked up right where we left off. I think those are some of the best friendships you can have.

This post was written at the request of Booklicity, which I was happy to do because I’ve been a fan of MWF Seeking BFF since early 2010.

| Tags: 13 comments »

13 Responses to “MWF Seeking BFF”

  1. Virginia Bonnett

    Oh my goodness, this totally speaks to me. When my husband was excepted into the Air Force JAG, we moved to Colorado and I knew no one. I sobbed for days. (I’m a people person. I need the people.) I joined a book club, a walking group, a mom’s group and the YMCA. I met two forever friends in the book club and am devastated to be moving to Texas and leaving them behind. But, since they are now forever friends, I know I’ll still see them.

    I also have my child hood best friend. She’s still in Illinois, but we’re still super close and it’s just like you said, the years just melt away every time we see each other.

    Thanks for sharing this! I heart finding new blogs!

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  2. Kristina ()

    Thank you so much for sharing this!! I think that making friends is a necessity in my life right now. I just turned 30 and really have no BFFs to speak of. I have a good friend that I go to lunch with once a week and our boys are in the same daycare which is where we met. But that’s it, I really like her but there is an issue with another friend that I have (we also met through our boys being in daycare)…..they don’t like each other! YIKES!! I feel like if I get close to one, I betray the other so it’s by my own doing that neither one of them are a BFF. So….thank you again for sharing this and I will be getting there and reading all I can!!

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  3. Emily R

    I reconnected with a childhood best friend who I hadn’t talked to in about 10 yrs. We had just taken different roads that we couldn’t travel together. I was and am happy to hear her voice. We are still on those 2 different roads that we can’t travel together. But I think about her every day, and hope that our roads will intersect again someday.
    But my BFF for 9 yrs I have reconnected with after 7 years of absenteeism. It makes me so happy because we now share so much in common. We are like literal sisters, and I know that we would never hurt each other. We would always tell each other the truth, even if it hurts. I love her to pieces.

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  4. nikki ()

    What a timely post for me! Rather than being the one to move away, all of my friends have slowly started to leave my area, and now my closest friend is nearly an hour’s drive away. I stay sane through work friends and blog friends, but in four weeks, I’m going to start a new ‘career’ as a stay at home mom to a four year old and a brand new baby. I’m terrified of putting myself out there to try and make new friends, but I know I have to or else I’ll go crazy. I’m so grateful to you, Trish, for introducing me to this blog!

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  5. Sandy

    This is the perfect example of why I need to follow more than book blogs! I need to get out there! I find that I make friends easily, whether it be through a book club, through the kids’ school, or through my golf league. But a real close BFF? That takes love, time and alot of nurturing. I think you are lucky if you find a few of those in your lifetime.

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  6. Heather Rosdol ()

    The position of BFF is currently filled and has been for almost twenty years by my husband. He’s just like that. We like the same things, (well he doesn’t read and I don’t watch football) but I can talk to him about anything including when he hurts my feelings. Now, he doesn’t always get it, but he tries.

    I admit, it would be nice to have a female BFF, but after being burned several times and because I don’t tolerate women who bash their husbands, I seem to have a hard time finding someone to fit that spot in my life. I have plenty of girlfriends. But not one I’ll let in enough to be a BFF.

    Heather

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    trish Reply:

    Heather, I’ve found my husband to be my BFF as well, but there’s something about a female BFF that’s different from my husband. My husband only wants to hear something once. A girlfriend will let me look at it from all angles, ad nauseum. Sometimes that’s good, sometimes I realize I don’t need to hash and rehash something over and over again, no matter how much I want to. 🙂

    …of course, whenever I think about my husband as my BFF, I’ve got Bill Cosby in the background saying, Your spouse is not your best friend. If you’ve heard that skit, you’ll know what I mean. 🙂

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  7. Susan

    I am coming from a different perspective here. It seems to me that Rachel is working awfully hard at finding a BFF, when it’s kind of like love – you find it when you’re not looking for it. I’m glad she’s out trying to meet people, that’s not bad! It’s just, I’ve moved many many times all through my life, and I’ve had friends up and move away too, and what I’ve found is that when you really need a BFF, one comes along. There have been times when I haven’t had one in my life, and I’ll recognize it and say hey, I’m feeling lonely – and then one day she will be there. I’d say so long as Rachel is enjoying her life, and liking the people she is meeting, then maybe that’s all she needs right now. Like I said, it’s kind of like love, and the soul has its own time it moves to.

    So Trish, I would guess that knowing you and your lovely personality, you will find someone to hang about with you and the baby! lol I guess what I’m saying is that the real special bond that comes with real BFF, doesn’t come along all the time. For me it’s rare. Not everyone is BFF material! lol which is ok, because lots of people are friend material. I hope you and Rachel both find lots of good friends where you both find yourselves now! 🙂

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    trish Reply:

    Thanks, Susan! Your confidence in me gives me confidence in myself. 🙂

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  8. Heather Rosdol ()

    The only hard part I find about having my husband as my BFF is when we went through a rough patch in our marriage right before he lost his job. I didn’t have anyone to talk to. My family is not known for their compassion or their interest in how I am as long as I listen to them. So it was a very difficult time for me. Creatively, I wrote several very long novels of which some publishers might be very proud of. But they were cathartic for me. My husband was always the bad guy, running out on me and I was left to pick up the pieces of my life. I also expressed my dissatisfaction artistically showing my feelings of being trapped and throwing away my dreams of being a writer. I journaled. It didn’t help. I needed a girlfriend, but I didn’t have one. So having one is great, but they don’t fall out of the trees. I had one for 35yrs, since I was in the first grade. But I finally realized she wasn’t healthy for me. No one has been that close to me since then. I’ve got so much baggage. Do you have to share that with a BFF or can you start from where you are at this point and go forward? Heather

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    trish Reply:

    Yeah, that’s hard, Heather. You mentioned before about not liking women who bash their husbands. I’ve made a conscious effort to not talk about any issues my husband and I have, unless the issue rests solely with me (which sometimes it does). But it does make it hard to work things out in your head when you don’t have someone to talk to. At least, that’s how my brain works. I tend to think better when talking to someone.

    Not sure what my point is…so I’ll just leave it at that. 🙂

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  9. Heather Rosdol ()

    Oh and my husband and I worked things out. He was so worried about losing his job that he worried about that all the time and became this short tempered mean sick person. We finally talked and he lost his job and a weight was lifted off his shoulders. He was much easier to live with after that. And he is not ever allowed to keep things from me ever again.

    Heather
    and I rehash all the time. He just puts up with it. Or tunes me out!

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  10. Natasha @ Maw Books ()

    A great place to find new mommy friends is at the library! Especially the ones that you see at storytime week after week. One such mommy asked if I wanted to go to her house for lunch after storytime. We had never spoken before! I didn’t know her from Adam. But I took a chance and said yes. She is now my very closest friend. We started alternating lunch after storytime every week and I decided to pay her kindness forward. Another mom was also always at storytime but we never spoke either. I asked her to lunch as well. Later, she in turn invited her neighbor. Two plus years later and I consider this group of mommies to be my closest mommy friends and we meet together religiously every Friday. Moral of the story? Take a leap of faith.

    And it’s never too early to start taking baby to storytime either. I think my first was six months when we started to go and five years later it’s still a hit!

    [Reply]

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